Poor Me

This past week when they were hanging out, my uncle told my parents that it was a shame that I had so many kids, that I was to be pitied. I get that reaction a lot from my relatives. Another uncle asks me every time he sees me why in the world I got my master's degree. The general concensus is that I am wasting my education (and therefore my entire life) by staying at home and changing poopy diapers.

I guess they think being a stay-at-home mother is the lowest of the low, something no one would do unless they had to, like if they had no education, no other opportunities, no birth control. One or two kids would have been acceptable for me so that I could get on with my career, if you call what I had before the kids a career.

Of course I get offended because my education is very valuable to me. Not necessarily in bringing in the dough (although it does a little bit) but in shaping who I am today. I've learned so many things from my college education I don't know where to begin. The best lessons I've learned are the non-book stuff. Like thanks to my master's research, I now have the good sense to doubt all those crazy research findings that seem to pop up every week. Plus, I met most of my best friends and husband in college. And I had fun growing into myself. I don't know how anyone can consider all that a waste.

As for raising kids, it's the best investment any way you look at it. Hopefully, by the end of these 18 years, I will have raised 3 productive adults who will not only benefit other people but whom I can mooch off of till I die (not just for money but also for rides and cantankerous demands). In the process, I get to learn worthwhile things for myself like how to be patient, how to be humble, and how to appreciate little things more.

But I won't be telling my uncles all this. I'll just accept their pity, misplaced though it is. Their pity means more sympathy and leniency with me which translates to more freebies, more food, more exceptions for me at family functions. Somehow I can live with that.